Sincerely yours…

Hey you,

It’s been awhile since we talk. Feels like I’ve been avoiding you. I don’t know why. Strange, since you’re the very person I long to see and talk with. I miss you.

I even don’t know why I wrote this. Did I hope that somehow you’d find this insignificant blog and read my note to you? Yes, I do, although you may not realize for whom I wrote it. Well, no matter.

Do you know something? I’ve never really thought of myself as an happy person. Yes I know that I have a wonderful life, more than I can say compared to a lot of others. Still, people tend to look up instead of down. Myself included. When I looked up, all I see is Can you blame me for that? Hm, maybe you should. I know I should But, I remember one particular day where I felt…happy. You were there.

What is it about you, I wonder? Is it maybe your smile? Your personality? Your ideals? What? I’ve been trying to figure it you and yet found no definite answers. Maybe it’s just you. Your whole being. Oh, I know that I sounded like a guy hitting on women in singles bar, but really that’s how I feel. Put a name to it, might as well call it love. Hey, bingo! Hehehe.

Yeah, that’s me. Can’t help myself not to joke around all the time. Sorry.

Love, infatuation, whatever. It’s not important. You made me happy, and for me, that means a lot. Problem is, can I do the same to you? My below standard self-esteem says no. There you go. This delirious, pot-bellied, professional procrastinator couldn’t possibly have anything interesting to offer you. And I believed that. Me. The biggest ego this side of hemisphere felt inadequate. You must be really something, and hey, you are.

By this time I bet I’m beginning to bore you. I’d better make it short then *a bit too late for that*. I know, that looking to far ahead, like wanting to be with you, is like waiting for world peace. Impossible in our lifetime. Thus, for know, all I want is just to see you again. That’s it. We can have some coffee or something, your choice. After that, well, let’s just see. Perhaps another coffee, perhaps more. Who knows? Maybe, just maybe, world peace is possible after all.

Now, it’s time for bed. I hope you’ll have a good night…and dearest, have a sweet dream.

To join the morning ritual of commoners…

News flash: I found myself a steady job!

Yup. That’s right. After two years of earning a living as a freelancer…now finally I tied myself to an establishment. Thus the revolutionist comes home.

This is actually my second month. I’ve got to tell you…it’s so so hard to change two years of working habit to another. It used to be waking up with sunlight awash all over the room. Now, when I woke up, the sun barely blinking yonder east (it’s obviously an exagerration but bear with me).

Also my caffeine habit starts to flourish in a manner I’ve never expected before. I need my daily shot lest I become a living dead working for a paycheck. Never ever that happened before. Coffee was always a liquid of fun and enjoyment, never a necessity.

Waking, working and slouching till the sun rises? Adieu to that…

Drive wherever I want, whenever I want? We went separate way…

And so, the question is…what the hell was I thinking?!

But am happy now I’ve chosen this path. Somehow, everything became much more…defined. Certain doubts were answered and I’m thankful. Met a lot of new people, cool people. Encounter a few new absurdities. It’s delightful. Changing one’s life is never an easy task I know. But really, the process is not all that bad. I might enjoy this. We shall see where this path will take me.

Still, I will forever hates the traffic.

Now, back to work.

Quitter…

How to become one? Easy, just start something and stop halfwa

Days of Cinematic Adventures a.k.a JiFFest 2008

Starting today, for the next five days I will be joining the throng of thousands of Jakartarians lining up to the doors of theaters across town. Yes, the tenth Jakarta International Film Festival’s finally here.

Although I couldn’t call myself a avid movie buff, I always enjoyed watching movies. They let me tap into another world, another reality without me having to try hard. Unlike reading a book, you are spared from having to build your own theater of mind (which was why I like reading books better). They are…how to put it…packaged imagination. Of course we are talking about good movies here, because the bad ones, well…they tend to make me want to run back to my own reality instead.

And so, film festivals, like JiFFest, present an excellent opportunity for me to tap and enjoy dozens of realities from around the world, with reasonable price too!

Thus, be on the look out! For tomorrow, and the days after, I will walk into the theaters, sitting comfortably as the lights dim and let myself be whisked away to faraway places for two hours or so. And maybe, those faraway places delight me so, that I’ll be compelled to share them to all of you. I have one already in mind but that’s for next post.

See you at the screening!